A GREAT DAY FOR THE BRITISH EMPIRE
In the great days of the British empire, and when we still had fleets in the 5 oceans and 7seas all without Radar, the army was also widespread all around the world, in one of these far flung outposts in darkest Africa , a new commanding officer was sent to a jungle outpost to relieve the retiring colonel.
After welcoming his replacement and showing the usual courtesies that protocol decrees (gin and tonic cucumber sandwiches etc) the retiring colonel said. “you must meet my Adjutant, Captain Horace Smithers, he’s my right-hand man. He’s really the strength of this establishment, his talents are simply boundless.
Smithers was duly summoned and introduced to the new CO who was surprised to meet a humpbacked, one eyed, toothless, hairless, scabbed and pockmarked specimen of humanity,with a constant green drooling snotter hanging from his nostrils , with only one arm, one leg and only three feet tall.
"Smithers old man. Tell your new CO about yourself.”
“Well, sir, began the diminutive hopping officer, I graduated with honours from Sandhurst. Joined the regiment and won the Military Cross and Bar after three expeditions behind enemy lines. I’ve represented Great Britain in equestrian events and won a silver medal in the middleweight boxing division of the Olympics, I have researched the history of the Zulu tribes and the Watusi“...............................
The colonel interrupted, "Yes. yes, yes never mind all that Smithers, he can find all that in your file later".
Tell him about the day you told their witch doctors to flip Off.
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